Here’s the punchline of this whole article: control the conversations that you’re having with yourself. 

LEAD these conversations.  


If you’ve worked in corporate America, or any workplace that has meetings, you know how quickly the convo can derail in a staff meeting. (You also know how accurate the television show The Office was.) Some dumbass says one thing and it opens up another segment of the meeting that NO ONE signed up for. It takes everything to keep your eyes from rolling back in your cranium. After all, you’ve got other shit to do.

Much like a runaway meeting needs a strong ass leader to refocus the intention and course correct the meeting quickly. When shit gets outta hand YOU need the same for your own thoughts everyday. 

Imagine if the things you told yourself were projected on a wall for you to see right now. What’s the shit you’re thinking? Is your internal dialogue kind and helpful to getting what you want? 

Not sure? Take a look at the different areas of your life. How do you currently feel about your...

Romantic relationship?

When it comes to any of these, what’s your physical or emotional response? Your response, negative or positive, is a signal and indicator of your experience. Your experience is a result of your thoughts on the subject. Thoughts are what you have control over.


Did you know that even if your relationship with your parents isn’t what you’d hoped for, you can still change how you feel about it? 

So maybe you and your dad don’t see eye to eye on things. Is that really what you want to think about when he comes to mind? 

Allow yourself to relate to him differently. Find the silver lining and focus on the positive aspects of him as an individual person. Doing this can change your emotional response when he pops to mind. 

Maybe he’s stellar at gardening and you love that about him. It’s awesome to see him (and anyone for that matter) have something that they love to do and that brings them so much joy. 

Maybe your relationship with your parents is more complicated - painful even. Lady, nearly everyone can relate to that. Instead, look at what you’ve done with life IN SPITE of it. 

Have you thought about taking that neg and turning it into an emotional-fist bump? Yeah, dad or mom can be out there doing whatever they will, but look at your marvelous self! Maybe the thought of a wayward parent inspires feelings of gratitude because you escaped that shiz. 


When you think about your current bank account balance, does your stomach roll up inside itself? If so, it’s painful (and uh 100% relatable.) Instead of avoiding checking if your account is negative again, what if you change your thoughts about it? 

I’m stoked I have a safe spot to put and stack away my coins. 

I’m glad that I’m being responsible and that it’s growing. 

(This method is called reframing and highly effective for becoming someone with a positive mindset.)

For those whose bank account goes into the negative frequently, it’s guaranteed they have a solid ongoing dialogue consisting of self criticism, shame, embarrassment, feelings of “Imma fraud and I have to find ways to tell people I can’t hang out with them, but not let on to the fact that my bank account is in the red.” 

WOMAN! First, you're not alone. Second, if you change your relationship with how you feel about your bank account and how you feel about your relationship with money, your bank account balance would look a lot different. 

If you’re consistent enough at speaking kindly to yourself, soon your account will have multiple digits. Instead of just a period separating the cents from the dollars, you’ll have a comma separating your dollars from the thousands. Cha-ching!   


Be kind to yourself with your self-talk. Give yourself some slack. Practice self forgiveness for all your past fuck ups. Don’t dwell on them. Dwell on the future and who you’re becoming - dream and visualize. 

Sometimes it only takes one sentence, or one small vision to flip your whole life around.

Meeting adjourned, bitches! It’s happy hour. 

Share this post with a friend who doesn't know they need a slap in the face with a dose of inspiration.